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读后续写微讲座四:读精(精析语言)外刊输入——悟语言之道MotherNatureAlwaysHasaSurpriseforUsUpHerSleeveWhenMotherNaturedecidestounleash(发泄)heranger,there'sverylittlewecandoexceptdealwithit.Inthepastyear,aseriesofnaturaldisastershasshockedtheimaginationandremindedusofourhumanlimitations.Therehavebeenfloods,droughtsandbigearthquakes.They'veshakenoursensesasthey'veaffectedbigcitiesandsmallvillages.AndnowavolcanoonIcelanderupts.Afterbeinginactiveforalmost200years,ithasbeenemitting(喷发)ballsoffire,iceandagiantcloudofashthathasparalyzedmuchofEuropeanairtravel.Itseemsasiftheskywascoveredbyablackcurtain!What'sworse,theairfeelsdifficulttobreathe.Theauthoritiescalledonpeopletoavoidactivitiesintheopenair.Withallofourattemptstotame(驯服)orpredictnature,weoftenfindourselvescaughtoffguardwhen“actsofGod”challengeourunderstanding.Weputourtrustinourdamsandlevees(堤岸),earlywarningsystemsandmoderndayweatherradarandthemanpowerwesummon(召集)whenuncontrollableforcesstrikeuswithanintensefierceness.Mostoftenwecanonlyrespondtodisasterratherthanpreventtheemergency.Wesufferthedestruction,deathandshortageofessentialsupplies.Wehavenochoicebuttotryourbesttorescueasmanyaspossible,burythedead,rebuildfromtheruinsandmoveon.NaturewillalwaysremindusthataslongasweareonthisEarthwewillhavetodealwiththisplanet'scharacteristics(特性)—itswindsandwaves,itsfiresandrain,anditsquakesanderuptions.Wemustacceptitsnaturalorderanddisordersothatwecansurvive.Whenwestarttogetalittlefullofourselvesorattachtoomuchimportancetooursmallaccomplishments,rememberthatalittlevolcano(whosenamemostofuscan'tevenpronounce)sittingonalittleislandintheNorthAtlanticforcesustositstillintotalwondermentorevensweepawaywhatweownnow.1.重点词汇再现(1)disastern.灾害(2)shockvt.(使)震惊(3)floodn.洪水(4)droughtn.旱灾(5)affectvt.侵袭学科网(北京)股份有限公司
1(6)volcanon.火山(7)eruptvi.(火山)爆发(8)breathevi.呼吸(9)intheopenair在户外(10)strikev.侵袭(11)emergencyn.紧急情况(12)deathn.死亡(13)supplyn.补给品(14)rescuev.营救(15)buryvt.埋葬(16)ruinn.废墟(17)survivevi.存活;生存(18)sweepaway消灭2.经典句型再现:asif引导表语从句Itseemsasiftheskywascoveredbyablackcurtain!天空看起来好像被黑色的窗帘遮住了!迷你语料库(MiniCorpus)序号佳句呈现赏析1StrangethingswerehappeninginthecountrysideofnortheasternHebei.描写灾难前的场景。特别注意inthecountryside中使用定冠词the。2Chickensandevenpigsweretoonervoustoeat,anddogsrefusedtogoinsidebuildings.描写灾难发生前的动物异常情况。其中运用“too...to...”结构,意为“太……以至于(不能)……”3Atabout3:00a.m.,on28July1976,brightlightswereseenintheskyoutsidethecityofTangshanandloudnoiseswereheard.描写灾难前发生的异常情况:出现亮光和不明原因的噪声。句中使用了并列的被动结构。4At3:42a.m.,everything概括性描述灾难的开始。学科网(北京)股份有限公司
2begantoshake.5Itseemedasiftheworldwerecomingtoanend!概括性描述灾难的严重后果。句中asif引导表语从句。6Nearlyonethirdofthewholenationfeltit!描述灾难的严重性。7Ahugecrack,eightkilometreslongand30metreswide,cutacrosshouses,roads,andwaterways.描述地震时地面裂开的场景。8Hardhillsofrockbecameriversofdirt.描述地震中山被震碎的场景,表示地震的严重程度。句子运用了比喻这一修辞手法。9Inlessthanoneminute,alargecitylayinruins.概括性描述灾难的严重性。10Twothirdsofthepeoplewholivedthereweredeadorinjured.Thousandsofchildrenwereleftwithoutparents.描述灾难造成的人员伤亡。第二句是“leave+宾语+宾补”结构的被动形式。11Everywheresurvivorslooked,therewasnothingbutruins.从幸存者的角度描述灾难的严重后果。续 表序号佳句呈现赏析12Brickscoveredthegroundlikeredautumnleaves,butnowindcouldblowthemaway.描述灾难之后,房屋倒塌,红砖落地如红色秋叶,满目疮痍。句子运用了比喻这一修辞手法。13Peoplewereinshock.描述灾难之后,人们的心理状况。14Water,food,andelectricitywerehardtoget.描述灾难之后断水、断电、断粮的场景。15Peoplebegantowonderhowlongthedisasterwouldlast.描述灾难之后人们惶恐不安的心情。学科网(北京)股份有限公司
316Soonafterthequakes,thearmysent150,000soldierstoTangshantodigoutthosewhoweretrappedandtoburythedead.描述灾难之后,军队士兵积极救助的场景。17Morethan10,000doctorsandnursescametoprovidemedicalcare.描述灾难之后,医护人员积极救助的场景。18Workersbuiltsheltersforsurvivorswhosehomeshadbeendestroyed.描述灾难之后,工人们积极帮助幸存者、提供庇护所的场景。19Hundredsofthousandsofpeoplewerehelped.Waterandfoodwerebroughtintothecitybytrain,truck,andplane.描述积极救助之后,城市逐渐恢复的场景。20Slowly,thecitybegantobreatheagain.概括性描述积极救助之后,城市恢复的场景。句子运用了“拟人”这一修辞手法。21Tangshanstartedtoreviveitselfandgetbackuponitsfeet.概括性描述积极救助之后,城市恢复的场景。句子运用了“拟人”这一修辞手法。22Withstrongsupportfromthegovernmentandthetirelesseffortsofthecity'speople,anewTangshanwasbuiltupontheearthquakeruins.描述在大家的共同努力下,灾后重建取得成功的场景。23Intimesofdisaster,peoplemustunifyandshowthewisdomtostaypositiveandrebuildforabrighterfuture.是文章升华处的描写。表明大家只有靠团结和智慧,才能够成功地进行灾后重建。24Fishermen,tourists,hotels,homes,andcarsweresweptawaybyhugewavescausedby细节描述地震的严重程度。学科网(北京)股份有限公司
4thestrongearthquakethatreachedamagnitudeof9.0.25Iwashavingbreakfastwithmythreechildrenwhenwaterstartedfillingmyhome.运用了“bedoing...when”句型,表示灾难发生的突然。26Wehadtoleaveeverythingandruntosafety.描写灾难发生的突然性。27Foreignaidisbeingorganisedforthetsunamihitcountries.描述灾后国际合作救援的场景。28However,dangerousconditionsanddamagedroadswillmakeitdifficulttodeliverfoodandsupplies.描写灾后救援会遇到的困难。运用了“make+it+宾补+todosth.”结构。读后续写入门篇:读精——精析语言(Analyzethelanguage)做读后续写时,为了保持所写的内容和语言与原文的连贯性和一致性,需要通过回读原文,利用“拉平效应”,创造性地模仿和使用语言,从而提高写作的效率和流畅度。分析语篇,可以从五个方面理解原文的语言运用技巧:1.场景描写(Surroundings)场景描写包括人、物、事发生的时间、地点、自然环境及社会场景等。场景描写可以充当背景信息,提供人、物、事发生的具体情景设定。其次,场景描写可以表达角色的感情、情绪,可以随着情节的发展有所变化,甚至可以提示、推动情节的发展,增强语篇的代入感。2.动作描写(Action)动作描写指的是描写人物在具体情况下的行为举止,是情节发展的具体体现。恰到好处的动作描写不仅可以塑造生动形象的人物,还可以反应人物的情感态度及心理变化,并最终反映人物的性格特点及思想品质。3.心理描写(Feelings)心理描写指的是描写人物在具体情况下的看法、感受、情感及心理活动,并由此反映人物的性格特点及思想品质。心理描写除了对心理的直接描写,还可以结合动作描写及场景描写,共同构建连贯紧凑的语篇。4.有效对话(Effectivedialogue)学科网(北京)股份有限公司
5有效对话是记叙文中塑造人物的一个重要手段。对话的有效性首先表现在符合人物设定。这样的对话不仅能够有效地推动情节的发展,而且能够增加叙述的生动性。此外,对话语言也要符合记叙文的语言特点——生活化、简化及去书面化。5.修辞(Figureofspeech)修辞是增加语言生动性的最佳手段。可以引起共鸣,使抽象的情境具体化。常见的修辞手法:比喻、拟人、夸张、排比。【典题精析】阅读下面的材料,完成以下任务。Whentherewasnewsthatastormwascoming,Sarahdidn'tthinkmuchaboutit.Shesimplyshruggeditofflikeanyothernormalday.Whenshewenttothegrocerystoreandsawthatitwasfull,shestilldidn'tworry.Peopleinsideranlikemadbetweenaisles(过道),grabbingwhattheycould.Morepeoplewerecrowdingin,pushingeachother.Evenmorewerewaitingoutside,tryingtomaketheirwayintothestore.BareshelvesandlonglinesmadeSarahchuckle(咯咯笑).Theymustbeoverreacting,shethought.Onherwayhome,shelookedoverhead.Darkcloudswereindeedforming.Andtheyseemedtoberunningquicklyacrossthesky.Still,Sarahwasnotbothered.Therainwouldbenicesinceithadbeenwarmlately.Whenshegothome,Sarahmadepopcornandsatonthesofawithherdog,Cooper,andgotreadytowatchamovie.Justasshehitplayontheremote(遥控器),sheheardthethunder,asloudasabomb.Rainstartedtocomedownhard,makingitalmostimpossibletoseethetreesinherfrontyardthroughthewindow.Cooperimmediatelyjumpedfromthesofa,barkinginfearinthecorner.“It'sOK.”Sarahsaid.ShemovedtoonesideandsawCooperlookedabitnervous.Sarahturnedoffthemovieandinsteadskippedtothelocalnewsstation.Thestormwasmuchmoreseriousthanshehadthought.Peopleinanearbycityevensaidtheyspottedatornado.Thereporteradvisedpeopletostayinsideandsecureallofthedoorsandwindows.Sarahgotupandbeganmakingherwayaroundthehouse.Cooperfollowedclosebehindasshecheckedallofthewindowstomakesuretheywereallfullyclosed.Bythetimeshegotbacktohersofa,therainhadstopped.“Thatwasn'tsobad,”Sarahsaidaloud.“Justaniceshower.”SheturnedtoCooper,whohadgonebacktothecornerandstilllookedabitfrightened.Shelookedoutside.Itwasactuallyverycalm,butshecouldseethatthewindwaspickingup.Thebranchesofthetreesweredancingwildlyandthegarbagebinhadtippedover.1.场景描写(Surroundings)学科网(北京)股份有限公司
6请选出以下场景描写的作用。A.介绍发生的时间B.介绍发生的地点C.介绍发生的自然环境D.介绍发生的社会场景E.推动情节发展F.表达感情(1)Whentherewasnewsthatastormwascoming,Sarahdidn'tthinkmuchaboutit.A(2)Whenshewenttothegrocerystoreandsawthatitwasfull,shestilldidn'tworry.B(3)BareshelvesandlonglinesmadeSarahchuckle.D(4)Rainstartedtocomedownhard,makingitalmostimpossibletoseethetreesinherfrontyardthroughthewindow.C(5)Andtheyseemedtoberunningquicklyacrossthesky.Still,Sarahwasnotbothered.F(6)Thebranchesofthetreesweredancingwildlyandthegarbagebinhadtippedover.E2.动作描写(Action)(1)请选出以下动作描写的作用。A.反映人物的形象B.反映人物的情感态度C.反映人物的心理变化D.反映人物的性格特点及思想品质①Shesimplyshruggeditofflikeanyothernormalday.B②Whenshegothome,Sarahmadepopcornandsatonthesofawithherdog,Cooper,andgotreadytowatchamovie.A③Sarahturnedoffthemovieandinsteadskippedtothelocalnewsstation.C④Sarahgotupandbeganmakingherwayaroundthehouse.Cooperfollowedclosebehindasshecheckedallofthewindowstomakesuretheywereallfullyclosed.D⑤SheturnedtoCooper,whohadgonebacktothecornerandstilllookedabitfrightened.Shelookedoutside.C(2)例④反映了萨拉什么性格特点?反映了萨拉能够全面周到地考虑到各个方面,并且遇到问题能够做出积极的应对。3.心理描写(Feelings)请选出以下句子用什么手法描写心理活动。学科网(北京)股份有限公司
7A.动词直接描述心理活动B.动作体现心理活动C.场景描写衬托心理活动D.间接引语体现心理活动(1)...shestilldidn'tworry.A(2)Theymustbeoverreacting,shethought.D(3)Still,Sarahwasnotbothered.Therainwouldbenicesinceithadbeenwarmlately.C(4)Cooperfollowedclosebehind...B4.有效对话(Effectivedialogue)找出文章中的对话,并体会其有效性。5.修辞(Figureofspeech)请选出以下句子用了什么修辞手法。A.比喻B.拟人C.夸张D.排比(1)Peopleinsideranlikemadbetweenaisles(过道),grabbingwhattheycould.C(2)Andtheyseemedtoberunningquicklyacrossthesky.B(3)Justasshehitplayontheremote(遥控器),sheheardthethunder,asloudasabomb.A(4)Peopleinsideranlikemadbetweenaisles(过道),grabbingwhattheycould.Morepeoplewerecrowdingin,pushingeachother.Evenmorewerewaitingoutside,tryingtomaketheirwayintothestore.D学科网(北京)股份有限公司